여러분은지금인생에서
특별한상황을맞이하고있습니다.
You are about to embark
in an unusual journey.

이혼이라는터널에들어가고
또빠져나오는긴시간은
The long and dark tunnel
called “divorce”

누구에게나혼란스럽고
힘들고고통스럽게느껴집니다.
is always emotionally confusing-
it’s tough and painful.

마치롤러코스터를타는것처럼
오르내리는감정의기복을경험하죠 순간
It’s like a rollercoaster ride with
many emotional peaks and valleys.

한순간마음이진정되다가도
다시금 불안해지거나슬퍼지거나
You might feel at peace at one moment
only to experience sadness or anxietythe next.

때론말할수없는
좌절감에휩싸이기도합니다.
Sometimes you may become
overwhelmed with hopelessness.

그러면여러분이겪는힘겨운시간은
여러분의자녀들에게어떻게다가올까요?
Now think about what your children
would go through at such difficult times.

나한테왜이런일이생기는거지?
내가뭘잘못한걸까?
They may wonder, “Why is this happening to me?
What did I do wrong?”

난누구랑살아야하지?
엄마아빠를앞으로못보게되면어쩌지?

Who am I going to live with?
What if I never get to see mom or dad again?

학교는? 내친구들은?
나는앞으로어떻게되는걸까?
What about school? Friends?
What will become of me?

우리부모들만큼아니그이상으로
자녀들도어려운시기를겪고있습니다.
The children will go through a hard time.
perhaps even more than their parents.

우리는이혼과정에서아무리힘들더라도
먼저자녀들을바라보고
Divorce may be hard for you
but you should put your children first,

자녀들이부모의이혼을잘적응하고
건강하게성장할수있도록지켜줘야합니다.
help them cope with thedivorce
and help them grow to be healthy adults.


이영상은여러분이“사랑하는자녀들을
이혼의부정적영향으로부터지켜내고
이혼이후의새삶에성공적으로
적응할수있도록”
돕기위해제작되었습니다. (대사+자막)
This video has been produced in order to help you
protect your lovely children
from the negative impacts of
a divorce and to help you to
successfully adapt to a new life after it.

자 이제 이혼 부모들과 자녀들을 함께 만나보시죠
So let’s meet the parents going through
a divorce and their children

또술먹었어? (대사+자막)
Did you drink again?

또잔소리야? (대사+자막)

What’s it to you?

싸우지마! (대사+자막)

Don’t fight!

장은아(5세)
부모가양육권분쟁중(자막만)

Jang Eun-Ah (five years old)
Parents are involved in a childcustody dispute.

엄마가왜안들어오지? (대사+자막)

Why isn’t mom coming home?

나때문인가봐~(대사+자막)

Maybe it’s because of me.

강준우(9세/초2) 부가모의면접교섭불허(자막만)

Kang Joon-Woo (nine years old/a 2nd Grader)
Father is not allowing the mother to see him.

아빠, 진짜아빠자격없어엄마만불쌍해(대사+자막)

Dad,you’re really unfit to be a father.
I feel sorry for mom.

최수영
(17세/고1)
부가모에게 1년째양육비미지급
면접교섭불이행(자막)


Choi Soo-Young
(17 years old/a high school freshman)

Father has not givenchildsupport
for a year and failed to visit her
?

2:35
캠프당일(자막)
The Day of Camp

이혼과정에있는부모와자녀들을위한
1박2일의캠프가열렸습니다.
It’s a one-night and two-day camp for couples
undergoing divorce and for their children as well.

강준우(자막)
Kang Joon-Woo

김민영
재판이혼중
남편의면접교섭불허(자막)
Kim Min Young
Undergoing divorce proceedings
Husband hasdeniedvisitations

이영희장은아장철수
재판이혼중아이를서로키우겠다며양육권분쟁중(자막)
Lee Young-Hee Jang Eun-Ah Jang Chul-Soo
In the middle of a childcustody dispute

아빠빨리와(대사+자막)
Dad, hurry.

최수영최정훈최준영
숙려기간중
아빠가 1년째양육비미지급
Choi Soo-Young Choi Jung-Hoon Choi Jun-Young
Going through a deliberations period
Father has failed to givechildsupport for a year

오기싫었는데억지로왔어요(대사+자막)
I didn’t want to come but I forced myself to do so.

왜요? (대사+자막)
Why?

아빤우릴버렸어요
아빠랑말도하기싫어요(대사+자막)
Dad abandoned us.
I don’t even want to talk to him.

캠프당일(자막)
The Day of Camp

엄마와함께캠프에
참가한 9살준우
Nine-year-old Joon-Woo
came to the camp with his mom.

엄마를거부하는
모습을보이는준우(자막)
Joon-Woo seems
uncomfortable being with his mom.

오랜만에만난엄마인데
준우는계속엄마를거부하고
피해다니기만합니다.
This is his first get-together with his mom in a long time
but Joon-Woo keeps avoiding her and
is distancing himself from her.

준우엄마랑놀까? 응?
Would you like to play with me? Huh?

싫어
No.

엄마를 또 거부하는 준우(자막)
Joon-Woo continues to refuse his mom

준우는결국엄마를피해
침대반대편으로
달아나버립니다.
Eventually, Joon-Woo takes refuge
at the far-corner of the bed,
away from his mom.

아이아빠가아이한테
어떻게이야기하는지모르겠는데(대사+자막)
I wonder
what his dad told him about me

어느정도까지얘기를하길래
준우가저렇게저를거부하는지..
정말슬퍼요(대사+자막)
What he must have told him
to make Joon-Woo
hate me so much. . .it makes me very sad.

캠프<토닥토닥레크리에이션> (자막)
The camp ?“The Peck-Peck Game”
아빠가출근할때뽀뽀뽀
엄마가안아줘도뽀뽀뽀(노래)
Kiss, kiss, when daddy goes off to work
Kiss, kiss, again when mommy hugs me

서로의어색함을풀고친밀감을쌓기위한
시간이마련됐습니다.
The purpose of this activity is to
break the ice and to build rapport.

뽀뽀뽀친구(노래)
Kiss, kiss, kiss, my friends

가족그림그리기에나선아이들,
그런데준우가그리는
엄마의모습이심상치않습니다.
The children are now working on some drawings.
But there’s something amiss about
Joon-Woo’s rendition of his mom.

준우야,이게엄마야?
엄마야?
Joon-Woo, is this supposed to be me?
Is this mommy?

응
Yeah.

그림속에서아빠와준우가선반대편에그려진엄마의모습은
엄마에대해준우가가지게된
왜곡된이미지를보여줍니다.
The mother, depicted on the opposite side of
where the father and Joon-Woo are standing,
shows Joon-Woo’s distorted image of his mother.

준우는부모의이혼소송이시작되면서부터
엄마와떨어져아빠와
함께살게되었습니다.
Ever since the divorce proceedings began,
Joon-Woo has been separated from his mother
and haslived with his father.

준우가그린그림들(자막)
Joon-Woo’s drawings
5:19
이거준우가읽은책목록인데요(대사+자막)
This is a list of books Joon-Woo has read.

아네
I see.

이게두달만에
다읽은목록이에요(대사+자막)
These are the books he read
in just two months.

굉장히많은책을읽었네요(대사+자막)
He readsquite a lot of books.

네네네
Yes, yes.

준우는지금만으로도충분히행복하고
아빠혼자서도애를바르게키우고있는데
Joon-Woo is happy with the way things are
and I am doing a good job in raising him right.

네
Yes.
왜굳이자꾸그여자와연결시켜서
그쪽방향으로계속몰아가시는지..
So why doyou keep on trying to get that woman
involved and drive us towardthat direction.

아버지입장은~
I understand your ---

아버님이생각하실때
준우가학교생활도잘하고있고(대사+자막)
In your opinion,
Joon-Woo is doing good in school

송지영인천가정법원
가사조사관부모(자막)
Song Ji-Yeon, Family Affairs Examiner
Incheon Family Court

가정에서도너무생활을
잘하고있다고말씀하시지만
and you say
that he is enjoying his life at home as well.

아이가실제적으로생활을잘하고있는것이아니고
그상황을회피하는것일수도있습니다. (대사+자막)
But in reality, he may not be doing so well.
Rather,he is merely avoiding that situation.

그회피하는상황을아버님께서
잘인식을하셔야지(대사+자막)
You need to recognize the situation
he is trying to avoid

아이의상태를좀더
정확하게보실수가있고요(대사+자막)
in order for you to understand more accurately
the real condition your child is in.

아이가좀더행복한아이로
자랄수가있는것입니다. (대사+자막)
That will help your child
to grow to be a happier person.

강대성아빠(자막)
Kang Dae-Sung, Joon-Woo’s dad

아이는충분히행복해하고있는데
왜아이한테더악영향을줄수있는사람을(대사+자막)
My kid is perfectly happy.
So why is she asking us to get close

가까이하라는거죠?
전도저히이해를못하겠어요.
왜그래야만하죠? (대사+자막)
to someone who can have a detrimental effect on him?
I don’t get that. Why is that necessary?

캠프 7일전(자막)
Seven days before the camp.

아빠는준우에게
자신이엄마의몫까지
다해줄수있다고믿고있습니다.
Joon-Woo’s dad is confident
that he can provide him everything?
even his mother’s share of the family life.

준우야,
알림장이없다? (대사+자막)
Hey Joon-Woo, I don’t see your
teacher-to-parent notebook

알림장가져와봐(대사+자막)
Can you bring it to me?

어, 알림장
Oh, the teacher-to-parent notebook

준우의등교준비를도와주는아빠, 강대성씨
Joon-Woo’s father is helping Joon-Woo get
prepared to go to school.

너, 알림장
검사맡았어?
Hey, did get your teacher-to-parent notebook
checked?

학교에서나눠주는알림장을꼼꼼히살펴보다가
이상한점을발견합니다.
As he checks the notebook,
he notices that something is wrong.

너이거아직확인안했잖아(대사+자막)
Hey, you haven’t got this checked yet.

아빠한테확인해달라고왜안그랬어? (대사+자막)
Why didn’t you ask me to check it for you?

엄마한테확인받으래요(대사+자막)
They told me to get it checked by mom.

너네엄마는너버리고갔잖아(대사+자막)
Your mom left you and went away.

어?
Huh?

그럼누가확인해야해? (대사+자막)
So then who’s supposed to check it?

누가확인해야되냐고? (대사+자막)
Who’s supposed to check it?

나간엄마얘기는왜하니? (대사+자막)
Why do you bring up you mommy wholeft you?

엄마에게화를내는아빠의모습에
준우는주눅이들고맙니다.
Joon-Woo is crestfallen upon seeing his father
getting upset about his mother.

준우실내화주머니챙겨야지(대사+자막)
Joon-Woo, you need to take your slipper bag.

이번엔실내화주머니가
안보입니다.
This time, the slipper carrier is
nowhere to be found.

준우는열심히찾아보지만
끝내보이지않습니다.
Despite Joon-Woo’s earnest search,
the slipper carrier does not turn up.

없어(대사+자막)
I can’t find it.

너어디다흘리고온거야? (대사+자막)
Where did you lose it?

어제학교에서가져왔어? (대사+자막)
Did you bring it from school yesterday?

응?
Huh?

칠칠치못한건지
엄마랑똑같아요(대사+자막)
You’re careless
because you take after your mom.

강대성씨는배우자에대한분노를
곧잘아들준우에게쏟곤합니다.
Joon-Woo’s father often unloads his wrath
toward his wife on Joon-Woo.

아내에대한분노가
큰준우아빠(자막)
Joon-Woo’s father has ill-feelings
toward his wife

그리고준우가엄마를나쁘게생각하거나
기억속에서지워버리기를바랍니다.
And he wishes that Joon-Woo will think ill of
his mother or just totally forget about her

성덕규대한소아청소년정신의학회/의사(자막)
Dr. Sung Duk-Kyu
Korean Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry


엄마나아빠가상대편부모를
나쁘게이야기하고
미워하게되면그얘기를듣는아이는
결국그말대로
한쪽부모를미워하고
나쁘게생각하게됩니다. (대사+자막)
If one parent speaks ill
of the other parent to his/her child or
if one parent expresses to his child animosity
toward the other parent,
then that child will eventually end up
hating the target parent of such ill-speak and animosity.

그리고자기를자꾸혼내는아빠도
미워하게되죠(대사+자막)
The child will also hate the father who
constantly reprimands him.

그런데엄마나아빠를
미워하고싫어하며(대사+자막)
자란아이가심리적으로밝고건강하게자라기는어렵습니다. (대사+자막)
But it is hard to expect a child
that hates his mother or father
to grow healthy psychologically.

그리고자꾸혼이나면서자란아이는
자존감이낮은아이로성장하게되지요(대사+자막)
And a child who has been constantly reprimanded
grows into a person with low self-esteem.

그래서이혼하신엄마나아빠는
상대편을나쁘게얘기하시면안되고요(대사+자막)
This is why divorced couples should never
speak ill of one another in front of their children.

그리고부모가이혼해서
외롭고속상한아이한테
위로하고
격려하셔야합니다. (대사+자막)
And they should try
to comfort and encourage
their children
who have been hurt in their divorce.

8:47
캠프당일(자막)
The Day of the Camp

1년만에만난
최정훈씨가족,
그런데딸수영이는아빠와
아는체도하려하지않습니다.
The Choi family is together
for the first time in a year.
But Soo-Young, the daughter,
ignores her dad.

동생준영이가아빠와대화를나누는것도
못마땅한기색입니다.
Even the fact that his brother Joon-Young
is speaking to her dad is bothering her.

아빠곁에는
가지않는수영(자막)
Soo-Young doesn’t want to
get near her dad.

집을나가 1년동안소식이없었던
아빠에대해원망이쌓였던수영이
Soo-Young is resentful of her dad
who left them without any contact for a year.

저기요저여기서
못자겠어요(대사+자막)
You know, I don’t think
I could sleep here.

왜요? 문제있어요?
Why, is there a problem?

네
Yes.

뭐가문제예요? (대사+자막)
So what’s the problem?

방따로주세요(대사+자막)
Please give me a separate room.

지금남는방이
없어요
There are no other rooms
available at the moment.

결국아빠와
함께자기싫다며
취재진에게방을바꿔달라고
요구합니다.
She demands
that she be assigned to another room
saying that she does not want
to sleep in the same roomwith her dad.

최정훈아빠(자막)
Choi Jung-Hoon, Soo-Young’s dad

제가일년동안밖에나가있으면서
양육비를주지않아서애들엄마가힘들고(대사+자막)
I left home for about a year
and didn’t give them childsupport.

딸이그런걸보면서
저를아주나쁘게
생각하는것같아요(대사+자막)
That must’ve been hard on her mom,
and having seen all this,
Soo-Young resents me very much now.

캠프당일아침(자막)
Morning on the day at the camp

캠프에오기직전에도
수영이와준영이는
아빠때문에속상해하는
엄마의모습을봐야했습니다.
Even just before they came to the Camp,
Soo-Young and Joon-Young
saw the aggravation caused
on their mom by their dad.

이인간이또늦네(대사+자막)
This guy is being late again.

1년만에오는건데
이렇게늦을수있는거니? (대사+자막)
How can he be late
when he’s coming for the firsttime in a year?

정말너희들을조금이라도생각한다면
이렇게행동할수
있는거냐고(대사+자막)
I mean, how could he behave like this?
Doe he even think of you kids
even for just a little?


나안갈래귀찮아(대사+자막)
I don’t want to go. I don’t feel up to it.

나도아빠안보고싶어(대사+자막)
Me, either. I don’t want to see dad.

오현주엄마(자막)
Oh Hyun-Ju, Soo-Young and Joon-Young’s mom

1년내낸한번도
전화없었어요.
그런사람이어떻게
아이들을보고싶었다느니…(대사+자막)
There was not even one phone call
for a whole year.
How could such a person say
that he missed his kids and…

전그자체도이해가안돼요(대사+자막)
I just don’t understand it.

결국약속시간보다늦게
아빠가도착했습니다.
Eventually, Mr. Choi arrives
past the scheduled time.

약속시간이
몇시인데
지금오는거야? (대사+자막)
Do you know
what timeyou were supposed to be here?
What delayed you?

오는길에차가너무막혀서(대사+자막)
There was a big traffic jam.

11:13
아이들의심리상태는
어떨까? (자막)
Now, let’s take a look at what the children
may be going through.

아빠와함께엄마와함께행복해요(현수막)
Together with mom and dad, we’re happy.

어떠니? 엄마가뭐라고하지?
So, what does the mother say?

됐어? 엄마를 닮은 사람?
No? Anyone is like mom?

이렇게부모의갈등에노출된아이들.
그들이겼는심리상태를
알아보기위해
역할극을해보기로했습니다.
A role-playing game is set in motion
to find outwhat the kids are exposed
to in a parental conflict, what they may be
going through psychologically.

딸이쪽으로오고
So the daughter, move over this way…

1년동안연락도안하고응?
당신뭐냐고?
이제와서나타나서
애들을괴롭히냐고응?
No contact for a year, huh?
What are you?
Now you come out of nowhere
to torment the kids, huh?

맨날당신맘대로그렇게해야되?
내가오죽하면그러겠어
Do you always have to act as you please?
What do you think makes me be that way?

그만해(대사+자막)
Stop.

더크게소리
Gets louder

시끄러워 (대사+자막)
Be quite.

시끄러워(대사+자막)
Be quiet.

말문이막힌아빠(자막)
The father suddenly falls silent.

수영이가그동안
꾹꾹눌러두었던
말을터트립니다.
Soo-Young spills things
that’s been pent-up
inside her all this time.

지나치게아빠가행동하니까(대사+자막)
Mom’s nagging you because

엄마가지나치게잔소리를하잖아요(대사+자막)
you behave unreasonably.

숨이막혀서그래답답해서나왔어(대사+자막)
It’s suffocating, that’s why they came out.

그럼다
잘하면되잖아요(대사+자막)
Then why don’t the both of you
be nice to each other.

힘든거야, 그게(대사+자막)
It’s not that easy.

그럼우리생각은안하세요? (대사+자막)
Then you don’t think about us?

너희들한테는미안하지(대사+자막)
I’m sorry foryou guys.

미안할짓을
왜하세요?
Why do you do things
you’ll be sorry about?

너희들이싫어서그런게아니야(대사+자막)
It’s not you guys.

엄마가싫어서그런거라고(대사+자막)
It’s your mommy that I hate.

그럼왜결혼했는데요? (대사+자막)
Then why did you marry her?

12:40

강은숙
서울가정법원상담위원(자막)
Kang Eun-Sook
Counselor, Seoul Family Court

초기에수영이같은경우에는큰딸이잖아요(대사+자막)
Soo-Young is the oldest child in the family.

큰딸이고주변에서보니까
아빠는어느날나가버리고(대사+자막)
As the oldest child,
she’s seen how her father left them

엄마가생활비도벌고
자신들도양육하는모습,
지친모습을많이봤어요(대사+자막)
and saw how her mom struggled
to make ends meet
while also trying to raise them.

그래서엄마의감정이그대로
전이가돼서아빠에대한미움을
점점키워나갔어요(대사+자막)
So she empathizes with her mom
and her ill feelings toward her father
gradually grew inside her.

캠프<가족그림그리기>(자막)
The camp?Family Portrait Drawing

다섯살은아는이캠프에
부모님모두함께참석했습니다.
Five-year old Eun-Ah came to the Camp with
both of her parents.

은아의부모님은은아에대해
양육권분쟁소송을벌이고있는중입니다.
Eun-Ah’s parents are
having a custody battle over her.

그림을그리던은아가
갑자기배가아프다고합니다.
Eun-Ah stops drawing
and says she has a tummyache.

많이아파(대사+자막)
It hurts a lot.

약먹을까? (대사+자막)
Do you want to take some medicine?

아파(대사+자막)
It hurts.

최근들어자주
배가아프다고하는은아
Eun-Ah has been complaining
about tummyachesa lot lately.

엄마는그런은아를안고달래보지만
증상은쉽게사라지지않습니다.
Her mom holds her and tries to console her
but the symptom doesn’t go away.

빨리가, 빨리(대사+자막)
Hurry, hurry, let’s go.

다녀오시는게좋을거같아요
Think you’d better go.

응차, 가자가
Let’s go, let’s go.

결국근처의료실로
은아를데리고갑니다.
They finally take Eun-Ah
to a nearby doctor’s office.

안녕하세요안녕하세요안녕하세요(상호인사)
Good afternoon, good afternoon.

지금우선진찰상
특별한이상은없네요(대사+자막)
The examination shows nothing
particularly wrong with her at this point.

언제부터
배가아프다고그러죠? (대사+자막)
Since when has she started complaining of
tummyaches?

애아빠집에서자고올때는(대사+자막)
Whenever she sleeps over at her dad’s house,

뭘먹이는지
배가많이아프다고그래요(대사+자막)
I don’t know what he feeds her
but she always says she has a tummyache.

아그래요?
Oh, I see.

캠프 10일전(자막)
10 days before the Camp.


엄마와함께살고있는은아는
아빠와도꾸준히면접교섭을
하고있습니다.
Eun-Ah lives with her mom but
she has also continuously
been seeing her dad as well.

아빠와면접교섭중인은아(자막)
Eun-Ah visiting with her dad

와잘만드네, 은아도
Ah, you make them well, too, Eun-Ah.

후~~
Huff ~~

아빠와만나는날에는함께야외로나가기도하며
즐거운시간을가지곤합니다.
On her visitation days with her dad,
she goes outdoors and have a good time.

와~
Wow~~

하하하하하
Ha, ha, ha.

자
Here.

으하하하하
Heh, heh, heh…

은아야?(대사+자막)
Hey, Eun-Ah?

오늘재밌지? (대사+자막)
Are you having fun today?

응
Yeah.

은아야?(대사+자막)
Eun-Ah?
응
Yeah?

우리아빠랑같이살까? (대사+자막)
Would you like to live with daddy?

엄마는? (대사+자막)
What about mommy?

은아야아빠랑같이살자응?
Hey, Eun-Ah, why don’t we live together, huh?

후~후~
Huff, huff~

장철수아빠(자막)
Jang Chul-Soo, Eun-Ah’s dad

아이는경제력이있는
아빠가키워야지요.
그사람돈벌줄모릅니다. (대사+자막)
Children should be raised by fathers
who have the ability to provide for them.
Her mom has no idea about earningmoney.

돈을벌어도얼마나벌겠어요.
아이의교육이나환경면에서볼때(대사+자막)
제가키워야된다고생각합니다. (대사+자막)
Even she does, how much could she earn?
Considering her education and environment,
I think I should raise Eun-Ah

엄마, 저희왔어요, 네
Mom, we’re home.

장철수씨는은아를엄마에게서
데려와키울생각으로
양육권소송을
진행중입니다.
Eun-Ah’s dad wants to bring her home
and raise her himself
so he is waging a custody lawsuit
against Eun-Ah’s mother.

할머니(대사+자막)
Grandma
우리똥강아지 왔어? 아이고예뻐라(대사+자막)
Hello, my puppy. You’re so adorable.

은아야, 할머니안보고싶었어? (대사+자막)
Eun-Ah, did you miss grandma?

보고싶었어(대사+자막)
I missed you.

은아에게는할머니도계시기때문에
아이를키우는데에아무문제가없다는것이
장철수씨의생각입니다.
Eun-Ah’s dad feels
that it won’t be a problem raising Eun-Ah
because she also has a grandma.

아유 애미가 되가지고… //// 아휴, 꼴이이게뭐니?
엄마가애를이꼴로만들었네, 응?
But look at you, you look so unkempt.
Is your mom responsible for you looking like this?

아휴, 속상해, 아휴
It really breaks my heart.

엄마를비난하는할머니의말에
은아는갑자기풀이죽습니다.
Eun-Ah suddenly becomes less lively
upon hearing grandma criticizing her mom.

아이고 예뻐라.
Oh, guy, you are so pretty

하하하
Hah, ha, ha.

아이고예쁘다. 좋아?
Wow, it’s pretty. Like it?

예
Yes.

옷도 할머니가얼마나이쁜거샀는지봐라.
이렇게이쁜옷을
사입혀야지.
Look at this pretty dress grandma got for you.
Your mom should have bought you
pretty ones like this.

야예쁘다.
Wow, it’s pretty.

자입어봐, 까꿍. 하하하
Go ahead, try it on. Peek-a-boo! Ha ha.

까꿍
Peek-a-boo!

헤헤헤헤
Heh, heh, heh.

할머니가사주신새옷을입고은아는
제나이에어울리는재롱을부리기시작합니다.
Eun-Ah puts on the dress grandma got her
and starts to sing and dance, acting her age.

아유, 잘하네
Wow, you’re wonderful.

캠프 9일전(자막)
Nine days before the Camp.

아빠와의면접교섭을끝내고
집으로돌아오는길
Eun-Ah is now back home
after her visit with her dad.

엄마
Mommy

은아야잘놀다왔어? (대사+자막)
Did you have a good time, Eun-Ah?

응
Yeah.

저걱정하는거생각한해요? (대사+자막)
Do you ever wonder if I’d be worried about her?

그만좀해, 뭐그렇게크게늦은것도아니고(대사+자막)
Stop it. We’re not even that late.

하여튼극성은…
애가뭐잘못됐어? (대사+자막)
You’re so particular.
Do you notice anything wrong with her?

뭘알아야지
애를키워봤어야알지
You don’t know anything.
You wouldn’t because you haven’traised a child.

집에서걱정하는사람은
생각도안하고….
You have no consideration for
my being worried sick at home.

은아를조금늦게데려온것때문에
엄마와아빠사이에
또싸움이벌어집니다.
Eun-Ah’s mom and dad fight again because
Eun-Ah came back a little
past the scheduled time.

빨리가요
Just go.

은아야
Hey, Eun-Ah.

다음에아빠가또올테니까
더재미있게놀자(대사+자막)
I will be back next time.
We’ll have even more fun then.

응?
Huh?

자, 은아야손가락걸고약속~
Here, let’s do a pinky swear.

좀전과달리
아빠를외면하는은아
Unlike a few minutes ago,
Eun-Ah ignores her dad.

아빠와사이좋은모습을
엄마앞에서는보여주려하지않습니다.
Eun-Ah’s mom and dad make no effort
to act amicably before her.

이게뭐야? 사이즈도맞추지도못하고(대사+자막)
What’s this? It’s not even the right size.

큰옷을…여기앉아있어
It’s way too big… Stay here Eun-Ah.

아니엄마가있는데
왜저런옷을사주는거야?
Why get her that sort of clothes
when she has a mom?

은아야이거좋아하지? (대사+자막)
Un-Ah, you like these, right?

응
Yeah.

할머니가사준옷을
다른옷으로
갈아입히는엄마(자막)
Eun-Ah’s mom takes off
the dress grandma got her
and changes Eun-Ah into other clothes.

할머니가새옷을
사줬을때처럼
은아는아무말도하지않고
엄마가하는대로따릅니다.
Just as with the new clothes
from grandma,
Eun-Ah puts them on
without saying a word.

후라이? 바나나쥬스?
Fried egg? Banana juice?

주스는아침에먹었잖아
You had juice in the morning.

우리은하가좋아하는
콩이랑소시지도해놨지~
I’ve made your favorites,
beans and sausages~

저녁식사시간,
엄마는은아에게
아빠와있었던일을캐묻기시작합니다.
It’s dinner time.
And Eun-Ah’s mom starts asking Eun-Ah
about her time with her dad.


아빠랑집에서뭐했어? (대사+자막)
What did you do with daddy?

어~ 할머니가맛있는것도
하나도안해줬고(대사+자막)
Um, grandma didn’t make
any good food for me

그냥짜장면만
시켜먹었어(대사+자막)
and just ordered
blackbean paste noodles.

엄마가이렇게
맛있게해주니까좋지? (대사+자막)
Don’t you love it that
mom has made you all this delicious food?

응
Yeah.

엄마가최고지? (대사+자막)
Mommy’s the best, right?

응
yeah

엄마랑사는게더좋지?
아빠랑사는것보다(대사+자막)
You like living with me better
than living with daddy, right?

엄마, 나배아파(대사+자막)
Mommy, my tummy hurts.

또다시배가아픈은아(자막)
Eun-Ah has a tummyache again.

아빠와있었던시간들이
재미없었다고둘러대는은아
Eun-Ah fibs about
how she didn’t enjoy being with her dad

또배가아프다며
은아는식탁에서일어납니다.
Eun-Ah again says her stomach aches
and gets up from the table.

누구와같이살고싶은지
엄마아빠가물어볼때마다겪게되는증상입니다.
This happens every time Eun-Ah is asked
if she wants to live with her mom or dad.

그럴때면은아는인형한쌍을
품에꼭안아보곤합니다.
And each time, Eun-Ah holds tightly
on to a doll couple.

엉엉엉엉
Whaaaa

엄마아빠진짜가지마세요엉엉
Mommy, daddy, please don’t go. Whaaa

보통어린아이는
힘들고불안한마음을말이아닌(대사+자막)
Generally young children’s
emotional distress

신체증상으로표현하게되는경우가많습니다. (대사+자막)
is manifested though physical symptoms.

이아이는엄마아빠를
둘사랑하는것같아요(대사+자막)
It appears
that Eun-Ah loves both of her parents.

그래서엄마한테가서는
아빠를나쁘게얘기하고(대사+자막)
So she tells her mom
bad things about her dad



아빠한테가서는
엄마를나쁘게얘기하고(대사+자막)
and tells her dad
bad things about her mom.

그렇게눈치를
많이보게되는것같아요
그러다가두분이만나서싸우고(대사+자막)
She tries to please each of them.
And then when her mom
and dad engage in a fight

‘둘중한명을택해라’ 이렇게얘기하니까
이아이는
더눈치보고불안하고(대사+자막)
and ask her to choose one parent or the other,
Eun-Ah feels
more pressured to please both of them.

힘들어졌을것같아요. 그래서결국이힘든마음을(대사+자막)
This was probably hard on her.

배가아픈증상으로표현했을것입니다. (대사+자막)
She ended up expressing her heartaches
in the form of a stomachache.


20:23
캠프<함께행복해요레크리에이션>(자막)
The Camp ? Happy Together Hour

떨어져지낸시간만큼쌓인거리를
좁혀보기위해놀이를통해
마음을여는시간을가져봅니다.
This is a chance
to bring the family members closer
after many days of being apart.

우리은아최고
Eun-Ah, you’re the best.

캠프내내아빠를외면했던
수영이는게임을하면서도
Soo-Young, who has been avoiding
her dad through the camp

수영에게
다가가고싶은아빠(자막)
Soo-Young’s dad wants to get closer
to his daughter

좀처럼아빠에게다가가려하지않습니다.
But she still doesn’t want to get near him.

21/;12

하지만자신들에게조금이라도
다가오려고계속노력하는아빠의모습에
수영이도조금씩
마음을열어갑니다.
But seeing how hard her dad
tries to make amends,
Soo-Young starts
to open her heart little by little.

최정훈아빠(자막)
Choi Jung-Hoon, Soo-Young’s dad

딸같은경우는상당히거부감이심했는데(대사+자막)
Soo-Young was very hostile at first

이제는저에대해서이해를하지않을까
하는기대를하고있습니다. (대사+자막)
but now I’m hoping
that she might understand me.

1년이나만나지못하고
떨어져있던시간
There was a whole year of living separately
without seeing each other.

수영이와긴대화를
하는아빠(자막)
Soo-Young’s dad having a long conversation
with his daughter

그공백을한번에채울수는없겠지만
딸과함께하는이시간이
조금이라도서로에게다가가고
It’s a loss that could not be made up
in one fell swoop,
but Soo-Young’s dad hopes that

서로를이해하는시간이되기를
최정훈씨는바라고있습니다.
moments like these will help them
get reacquainted with each other

최정훈아빠(자막)
Choi Jung-Hoon, Soo-Young’s dad

그래도이렇게평소에보고싶었는데
만나지못하고상상만하다가(대사+자막)
I always wanted to see her
but I only dreamt about it.

이렇게아들하고딸하고
같이있으니까
참좋은것같아요(대사+자막)
Now that I am spending time
together with my children,
I feel very happy.

그래서앞으로도자주이런시간을
가졌으면하는생각을하고있습니다. (대사+자막)
So I hope that we will be able to
have more chances like this.

다양한놀이를통해준우와가까워지는엄마(자막)
Joon-Woo’s mom trying to get closer
to Joon-Woo through various activities

엄마를피하고외면하던준우도
레크리에이션시간동안
엄마와함께놀며
부쩍엄마와친해진모습입니다.
Joon-Woo, who had avoided and ignored his mom,
appears to be noticeably more friendly
toward his mom
during the recreation hour.

22:36

캠프<세족식>(자막)
The Camp ? Feet Washing Ceremony

‘아빠와함께엄마와함께행복해요’
프로그램을진행하도록하겠습니다.
We will now begin our program entitled
“Happy Together with Mom and Dad.”

저수건은있죠그걸뭐를 하냐 하면은
You see that towel, .with that towel…

엄마, 아빠가손을잡아주세요
Mom and dad please hold hands.

그동안우리가가족과함께하는것은
행복하고좋은일도많지만서로(영상이끊김)
The reason families stay together is that
even though there are happy, good times…

아빠를거부하지않는수영(자막)
Soo-Young is not resisting her dad.

엄마
Mommy

엄마에대한마음이열린준우(자막)
Joon-Woo has opened up to his mom.

23:24

미안함과그리움원망과이해의마음이
뒤섞여눈물로쏟아져내립니다.
Mixed emotions of regrets,
yearnings, resentment, and understanding
all pour down in the form of tears.
수영아
Soo-Young

23:53

캠프그후(자막)
After the Camp

캠프가끝난후
아이들은
부모에게미처다전하지못한말들을
편지속에담았습니다.
Following the camp,
the children have conveyed
what they did not get
to say to their parents in a letter.

아빠아빠아빠아빠아빠
Daddy, daddy, daddy, daddy.

너무불러보고싶었어. (대사+자막)
I wanted to say that word so much.

아빠어디아픈데는없지? (대사+자막)
Dad, I hope you’re healthy and well.

그동안철없이군거미안해. (대사+자막)
I‘m sorry for acting so immaturely.

이제자주봤으면좋겠어(대사+자막)
From now on, I want to see you often.

엄마를만나고온준우는
아빠한테편지를씁니다.
After his meeting with his mom,
Joon-Woo is writing a letter to his dad.

아빠저정말하고싶은
말이있어요(대사+자막)
Dad, there is something
I really want to say.

엄마가정말보고싶어요(대사+자막)
I really miss mommy.


진짜보고싶어요(대사+자막) 준우올림
I really miss her. Love, Joon-Woo

아들준우가엄마없이도
잘지내고있다고
믿었던강대성씨.
Joon-Woo’s dad believed that
Joon-Woo was doing perfectly well
without his mom.

하지만준우도
엄마와아빠가모두필요한
평범한아이였을뿐이라는것을
깨닫습니다.
But now he realizes
that Joon-Woo needs
both mom and dad
just like any normal kid.

은아는이제갓배운서툰글씨로
엄마와아빠에게편지를씁니다.
Eun-Ah is writing a letter to mom and dad
in her own handwriting she just learned.

엄마아빠는편지줄까? (대사+자막)
Will mom and dad give me a letter?

자, 이편지줄께(대사+자막)
Here, this letter is for you.

읽어봐
Read it.

‘아빠같이놀이동산놀러가요.
엄마랑아빠랑
같이놀아요’(화면)
Daddy, let’s go to an amusement park.
Mommy and daddy
let’s all play together.

엄마아빠대신
늘갖고다니는
사이좋은한쌍의인형에게
은아는자신의편지를전해줍니다.
Eun-Ah gives her letter
to an amiable couple
she always takes with her
instead of to her mom and dad.

아빠, 같이놀이동산놀러가요. (대사+자막)
Daddy, let’s go to an amusement park.

엄마랑아빠랑같이놀아요(대사+자막)
Mommy and daddy, let’s all play together.

엄마아빠사랑해요(대사+자막)
Mommy and daddy, I love you.

이와같이
이혼과정에서
부모가자녀에게
어떻게대하고
As you can see,
depending on how the parents
who are in a divorce process
treat their children,

어떤행동과말을하느냐에따라
자녀는더힘든심리적정서적
신체적문제를겪게되기도합니다.
how they act and talk, the children may experience
more difficulties psychologically,
emotionally, and physically.

부모의이혼이라는
어려운시기를통과하는동안
아이들도어른들과마찬가지로
As the parents are going through the
difficult process called divorce,
their children

상실의 5단계라는
심리상태를
거치게됩니다.
also go through
a psychological process
referred to as “The Five Steps of Loss.”

이혼과정에서자녀가
경험하는감정의단계(자막)
Emotional gradients children experience
during a divorce

이것을안다면우리의자녀들을이해하는데도움이됩니다.
If we understand this,
it will help us understand our children.

부인분노흥정우울수용(자막)
Denial, Anger, Negotiation, Depression, Acceptance

모든아이들이이단계를단순히순차적으로
경험하게되는것은아닙니다.
Not all children experience these stages
in that order.

단계별대표적인심리상태(자막)
Representative psychological stateat each stage

어느단계에서뒤로돌아가기도하고
어느단계에서장기간
머물기도합니다.
They sometimes revert at a certain stage and
sometimes remain in another stage
for a prolonged period of time.

1단계부인아닐거야아닐거야(자막)
Stage 1: Denial - No, it can’t be, it can’t be

2단계분노왜내생각은안해? (자막)
Stage 2: Anger ? Why can’t you think about me?

수용의단계까지나아가지못한채
성인이되기도합니다.
Some reach adulthood without
ever getting to the acceptance stage.

3단계흥정내가엄마, 아빠말을잘들으면
이혼을안할지도몰라(자막)
Stage 3: Negotiation ? Mom and dad might
stay together if I will be a good girl.

이혼가정자녀의가장두드러진심리적특성은
The most notable psychological trait
in children of divorced parents

4단계우울결국안되는구나. 난뭘해도안될거야. (자막)
Stage 4: Depression -
I guess this will not work. I will always be a failure.

5단계수용그래어쩔수없구나.
이해해야겠구나. (자막)
Stage 5: Acceptance -
Yes, it can’t be helped.
I will have to understand.

죄책감과버림을받았다는느낌이라고합니다.
is having a sense of guilt
and feeling abandoned.

이는영유아기에서부터청소년기에이르기까지
전연령에걸쳐나타나고있습니다.
This is shown across all age groups
from infants to teenagers.

연령별혹은아이의발달수준에따라
이혼에대한반응과심적특징은달라집니다.
Children’s reaction to divorce and their
psychological traits differ depending on
their age and level of development.

이를아는것역시
자녀를이해하는데큰도움이됩니다.
Knowing this also helps in
understanding our children.

27:21 자막시작
영유아기
Infancy

표현을못해도
마음이많이아파요.
Infants experience emotional distress
Even though they can’t express it.

아이는이렇게느껴요. (자막)
This is what infants feel.

아이는극심한공포와불안감에
휩싸이고
자극에느리게반응하거나
발달이지연되고
심지어퇴행하기도해요(자막)
Infants become engulfed
in extreme fear and insecurity,
show delayed reaction to stimulants,
and delayed development.
Sometime they even regress.


이렇게해주세요(자막)
This is what you should do.



스킨십과대화를통해아이가충분한관심과
사랑을느끼도록해주세요(자막)
Let the infant feel cared for and loved
through caressing and conversation.

주양육자와안정적인애착관계를
형성해성인이되어서도
바람직한관계를맺게되요
Forming a stable intimate relationship with the
main caretaker helps the infant make
good relationships as a grown-up.

유치원기(자막)
Kindergarten years

나때문이야
나는어떻게되는걸까(자막)
It’s because of me.
What will become of me?

아이는이렇게느껴요(자막)
This is what the kindergartners feel

내가잘못해서
엄마, 아빠가이혼하는거야라는
죄책감을느껴요
Kindergartners might feel guilty that
mom and dad are getting divorced
because of him.

아빠가떠나갔으니엄마도나를버릴지몰라
라는두려움에휩싸여요
Since dad left me, there’s no telling
when mom will leave me too.

이렇게해주세요
This is what you should do.

아이가느끼는분노와두려움을
잘표출할수있도록
감정을물어봐주세요
Ask your kindergartner how she feels
so that she will be free
to express her anger and fear.

초등학생기
Primary school years

엄마아빠는다시돌아올거야
Mom/dad will return.

아이는이렇게느껴요
This is what your child feels

부모의이혼을
이해하지만
재결합에대한
강한기대와
환상을가져
They understand
their parents’ divorce but they harbor
strong expectations and fantasies
about their mom and dad
getting back together.

학교생활, 친구관계에
어려움을보이고
부모와자신에대한걱정으로
아프기도해요
This could interfere with his school life
and strain his friendship.
It could also make him sick with worries
about his parents and about himself.

부모의모호자나위로자로나서는
애어른행동을보이기도하죠
And sometimes they act like grownups,
taking on the role of a protector and consoler.

이렇게해주세요
This is what you should do.

이혼후에도여전히
부모모두아이를사랑하고
돌볼것임을강조해주세요
Remind him that both parents
will continue to love him
and look after him even after the divorce

청소년기
Adolescence

나도내마음대로할거야
I will do as I please, too.


아이는이렇게느껴요
This is what your teenager feels

사춘기와맞물려
폭발적인정서변화가생겨요
They experience a dramatic emotional change
due to their adolescence

부모의이혼으로학교생활에문제를보이거나
반항, 우울증, 심지어자살을
시도하기도해요
They could act up in school, rebel, be depressed
Or sometimes even attempt
suicides because of a divorce

이렇게해주세요
This is what you should do

자녀가이혼을비난하거나공격하더라도
자녀의이야기를잘들어주고
보듬어주세요
Even if your teenager criticize you or
attack you for divorcing,
listen to her and embrace her.

28:50 여기까지모두자막임
캠프 15일후(자막)
15 days after the Camp

법원에서는이혼과정에있는부모들에게
자녀의양육계획을세우는데
실질적인도움을주기위해
부모교육을실시하고있습니다.
In order to give couples undergoing a divorce
practical help in making child rearing plans,
the court offers
training programs for the parents.

여러차례부모교육을거치면서
강대성씨는아들준우를위해
새로운결심을합니다.
After taking several training courses,
Joon-Woo’s dad makes a new resolution
for Joon-Woo’s sake.

여러차례의부모교육을받은
준우아빠강대성씨(자막)
Joon-Woo’s dad has taken
several training courses.

아이가많이좋아진것을
아빠도느끼세요?
Do you notice too
that Joon-Woo has gotten better?

네, 많이좋아졌어요
Yes, he’s a lot better now.

네
Yes.

준우와함께
법원면접교섭실을찾은강대성씨
Joon-Woo’s dad came to the
visitation room at the court with Joon-Woo.

아빠
Daddy

응 영~차
Yeah, humph!

그는준우가건강하고
밝게클수있도록
엄마와의면접교섭을
허용하기로했습니다.
He has decided to allow
Joon-Woo’s mom visitation rights
with Joon-Woo so that Joon-Woo will grow
to bea healthy and happy child

한결밝아진준우(자막)
Joon-Woo looks much happier

행복하게만날수있도록
도와주셔야됩니다.
You have to help out
so these could be happy get-togethers.

송지영인천가정법원
가사조사관(자막)
Song Ji-Yeon, Family Affairs Examiner
Incheon Family Court

아이의일상생활에방해되지않는선에서
당사자부모님이
정하시면됩니다. (대사+자막)
Parents should decide between themselves
so long as it doesn’t cause any disruption
to the child’s daily routine.

그대신에전화연락은
자유롭게하시는게좋고요(대사+자막)
As for telephone calls,
the more frequent it is, the better.

지금현재같이살고있지않는
부모님을아이가만나고왔을때, (대사+자막)
When the child comes back after visiting
with a parentwholives apart,

아이가같이생활하는부모님한테
죄책감이나미안함감정을느끼지않도록
해주시는것이중요합니다. (대사+자막)
it is important that you don’t make her
feel guilty or sorry for the parent
she lives with.

강대성아빠(자막)
Joon-Woo’s dad

아이엄마에대한나의분노나상처같은것이
아이한테영향이간것같아요(대사+자막)
My anger and hurt feeling toward Joon-Woo’s mom
seems to have affected Joon-Woo.

아이의상처를알게된게지금은
너무나다행이라고생각합니다. (대사+자막)
I think it’s really fortunate that
I came to understand Joon-Woo’s wounds.

30:24
법원의부모교육과상담을거치는동안이영희씨도
그동안자신의딸은아에게
이혼의 스트레스를전가했다는사실을깨달았습니다.
Through the court’s training program and counseling,
Eun-Ah’s mom also realized how she has been
passing on her own stress to Eun-Ah

부모교육을받고있는
은아엄마이영희씨
Eun-Ah’s mom is undergoing
the training program.

아주예쁘게찍어야되는데?
The photo should come out pretty.

아빠집에가서할머니한테
예쁘게인사잘하고(대사+자막)
Greet grandma nicely
when you get to dad’s house.

은아는요즘한층편한마음으로
아빠를만나러갈수있게되었습니다.
These days, Eun-Ah is able to visit her dad
without feeling burdened.

아빠한테인사드려야지
Say hi to daddy.

아빠
Daddy.

어은아야
Hi, Eun-Ah

야그동안많이컸네
Hey, you grew since I last saw you.

잘지냈어? (대사+자막)
Have you been well?

네, 잘지냈어요(대사+자막)
Yes, I have been fine.

갔다올게(대사+자막)
See you later.

네, 잘다녀오세요(대사+자막)
Yes, see you soon.

양육권다툼이은아에게얼마나
큰스트레스였는지
깨달은아빠엄마가
It’s all because Eun-Ah’s mom and dad,
realizing what a big emotional stress
their custody battle is

딸을위해새로운협력관계를
만들어가기로한덕분입니다.
have decided to forge a cooperative relationship
for Eun-Ah’s sake.

장철수아빠(자막)
Eun-Ah’s dad

친권이중요한것이아니라
우리아이를자주만나고
또아이엄마와
I realized that more than parental rights,
it is important to see Eun-Ah
as often as possible

좋은관계를유지하는것이
아이에게정말중요하다는것을
깨닫게되었습니다. (대사+자막)
and to maintain a good relationship
with Eun-Ah’s mom
for the sake of Eun-Ah.

타자..발…조심..옳지
Let’s go. Watch your feet. Good.

내가꼭잡을께
I’ll hold on tight.

응그래그래
OK, sure, sure.

은아야좋아?
Eun-Ah, are you happy?

응
Yeah.

하하하하하
Ha haha.

자 은아야 무서워하지 말고
Hey, Eun-Ah, Don't be afraid

이제은아는더이상
눈치볼필요없이아빠도엄마도
마음놓고사랑할수있는아이가되었습니다.
Now Eun-Ah is free to love
both her mom and dad
without having to worry about it.

하하하하하
Ha haha.
은아, 아빠랑재미있게놀았어요?
Eun-Ah, did you have a good time, huh?

응
Yeah.

우리은아왔어?
Look who’s here!

응갔다왔어
Yes, we’re back.

우리은아잘놀다왔어?
Did you have a good time, Eun-Ah?

뭐하고놀았어? (대사+자막)
What did you do?

키즈카페에서
미끄럼틀이랑
붕붕차랑사진도찍고
진짜재밌었어(대사+자막)
We went to KizCafe and rode
on the slide and
also the bumper car.
We took pictures and it was so much fun.

진짜재미있었겠다(대사)
You really had fun

엄마도다음에같이가자(대사+자막)
Let’s go together next time mommy.

엄마랑도다음에같이가자(대사+자막)
Then take me with you next time.

응
Yeah.

장철수아빠(자막)
Eun-Ah’s dad

정말행복했고요.
그동안못해준것이너무미안했습니다. (대사+자막)
We had a really good time.
I felt so sorry that I could not do this for her before.

우리은아가정말사랑스런아이라는것을
깨닫게되었습니다. (대사+자막)
I realized
that our Eun-Ah is truly an adorable child.

최정훈씨와오현주씨는
이혼과정의갈등이깊고길었던만큼
더오랜부모교육과상담시간이필요했습니다.
Soo-Young and Joon-Young’s mom and dad required
more training program and counseling because of the
difficult divorce process they went through.

상담을받고있는최정훈, 오현주씨(자막)
Soo-Young’s mom and dad receiving counseling

서로의감정싸움과오해로인해
자녀의면접교섭과양육비지급을
결정하는데있어
갈등이계속되었던것입니다.
Their flaring emotions and misunderstandings
had made it
difficult to come to a decision
about visitation rights and childsupport.

가면이사람이잔소리하고
또싸우게되니까갈수가없어요
If I go, she will nag me
and then we’ll fight again, so I can’t go.

네
I see.

이숙영
가정법원상담위원
Lee Sook-Young
Counselor, Family Court

아빠는지금아이양육비지급에대해
잘이해하고계시죠?
You understand well
about givingthe childsupport, right?

양육비를줘도
이사람멋대로써버리면
기분이별로안좋고요(대사+자막)
Even if I givechildsupport,
I don’t want her to
spend it the way she wants to.

하지만여러차례의부모교육과
상담을거치면서
양육비지급과면접교섭이그누구도아닌
아이들을위한것이라는
사실을깨달았습니다.
But after a number of
training courses and counseling,
he has realized that childsupport and
visitation rights are for none-other than
his own children.

부모교육과상담을
여러차례받은최정훈, 오현주씨(자막)
Soo-Young’s mom and dad underwent
a number of training courses and counseling

어떻게두분이아이의양육비에
관련된 합의를하셨나요? (대사+자막)
So, have you reached an agreement
as tochildsupport?

아니요, 아직협의를못했는데
어떻게해야할지(대사+자막)
No, we have yet to come to an agreement.
We don’t know

방식등을잘모르겠습니다.
얼마를 줘야 하는지…
The methods or how it should be done.
Or how much I should give.

강은숙
서울가정법원상담위원(자막)
Kang Eun-Sook
Counselor, Seoul Family Court

보통양육하지않는분이
양육비를양육하는분의
생활비로
착각을하시고(대사+자막)
아까워하는분들이많으신데,
절대그렇지않습니다. (대사+자막)
It is common for the parent
without child custody
to think of childsupport
as stipend for the parent
with the custody of the children.
Nothing could be further from the truth.

이양육비는아이들의생활비예요(대사+자막)
The childsupport is stipend for the children.


아이들에게들어가는
구체적인생활비가되는거예요(대사+자막)
It is specifically used
for the rearing of the children.

때문에이양육비에따라
아이들의생활수준이
달라지겠죠(대사+자막)
Because of this the children’s quality
of living willdepend on
how much child support is given.

아이들이미래에자신이이루고자
하는꿈을이루기위해서(대사+자막)
현실에서열심히공부도하고
As the children are striving
to realize their dreams,
by studying hard or do various activities

여러가지재능을살리기위한
행위를할때(대사+자막)
이양육비지급에따라
그꿈의크기가
달라질수있는겁니다.
to develop their talents,
how big a dream they dream
will depend on
how much childsupport is given.

그래서반드시 ‘양육비는아이들의생활비다’라는
부분을명시해서비양육하시는분들은반드시
양육비를지급될 수 있도록 하는것이
바람직합니다.
Therefore, it is important to remember that
the child support is for the children and
the parent without childcustody
should givechildsupport.

부모와함께이혼결정,
앞으로의일들에대해
미리자녀들과
대화해야합니다. (자막)
Parents should talk with
their children in advance
about the decision to divorce
and things to come.

이혼을결정했다는사실도
부모가직접
그리고정확하게
알려주기로했습니다.
It was also decided
that even the decision to divorce
will be conveyed personally
and accurately by the parents.

엄마아빠가정말많은고민끝에
결정한건대
이혼하기로했어
We have decided
after a long and careful consideration
to get a divorce.

이혼결정을자녀의눈높이에
맞게알려줍니다. (자막)
The news should be delivered in a way
that the children could understand

너희들이많이실망하고속상할거야
We know this will be hard on you guys.

자녀의마음을읽어주고
공감해줍니다. (자막)
Parents should understand and sympathize
with what their children are feeling

또슬프고화도날거야
Also, you might feel sad and angry.

정말미안해
하지만엄마아빠는
정말로너희를사랑해서낳았어
We’re really sorry.
But we gave birth to you
because we love you.

부모의변함없는
사랑과보호에
대한확신과안정감을줍니다. (자막)
Parents should also inspire confidence and
a feeling of security about their
unchanging love and protection.

그리고그사랑하는마음은앞으로도
결코변하지않을거야
And that love will never change.

너희들이힘들때언제든지 너희들 곁에
같이 있어주고 사랑한다고 엄마 아빠는 약속했어
We have promised that we will
always be with you in tough times.

엄마랑상의를했는데
너희들은지금처럼엄마랑살면서
토, 일요일에아빠랑
같이지내면어떻겠니?
Your mom and I spoke and we suggest that
you guys live with mommy on weekdays and
spend time with me on weekends.
What do you think?

앞으로의일들에대해명확하고
구체적으로알려주고의견도들어줍니다.
They also tell the children clearly
and specifically about things to come.

물론, 아빠가매일전화를하겠지만,
메신저로화상대화도하자.
그럼어때?
Of course I will be calling everyday.
But let’s also do video chatting.
How do you like that?

지금너희들마음은어떤지얘기해줄래?
Can you tell us how you’re feeling right now?

너희들힘든거엄마아빠가지탱해주고싶어
We want to give you our support if we can.

감정과의견을털어놓고애기하도록하여
적응을도와줍니다. (자막)
The parents should help the children adapt
by taking honestly about emotions and ideas.

앞으로도궁금한것을
언제든지물어봐
Feel free to ask us about anything
you want to know.

최선을다해서대답해줄께
We’ll try our best to give you an answer.

밝고건강하게
자라도록
아이들을지켜주는것은
이혼후에도여전히부모의몫입니다.
The parents’ responsibility
for supporting their children
to be happy and healthy remain unchanged
even after the divorce.

부부라는이름은끝나도
부모라는이름은
변함없기때문입니다.
The title “Parents” continues
even after “Husband and Wife”
no longer does.

36:45
우리가부부사이에벌어지는일들을
부부간의일로만받아들이고
감정을잘추스려자녀를
먼저배려해줄수있다면,
If parents could treat
what happens between them
as strictly their own problem and if they could control
their emotions to put their children first

그리고사랑과관심을다해자녀들에게
부모의관계는변함이없을것이라는
확신을줄수있다면,
우리아이들은
훌륭하게자랄수있습니다.
and if, through their love and care,
they could make
the children believe that their role as parents
will remain unchanged,
the children will be happy and healthy.

엄마와아빠가모두어떠한상황에서도변함없이
나를사랑하고지켜줄것이라고
확신하는아이는
자신감과자존감을가지고건강하게자랄수있답니다.
They say that children who believe that his or her
parents will protect them no matter
what will grow to be
a person with confidence and self-esteem.

자, 이제구체적을자녀에게
어떻게해야하는것인지알아볼까요?
Now, shall we take a look at
what specifically we should do?

왜그래?
도대체매일매일나한테이렇게하는이유는뭐야?
What’s wrong?
Why are you acting like this to me everyday?

에이그만해지겨워죽겠어그만해
Oh, stop it. I’m sick of it. Just stop it.

자녀앞에서욕설이나폭력적인행동을하면서
부부싸움을하는건
안.돼.요(자막)
Fighting in front of your children using
epithets or violence is a no-no


알았어. 나중에얘기해
OK, let’s talk later.

그래, 애들없는데서말하자
You’re right. Let’s talk just amongst ourselves.

너희엄마는
할줄 아는게하나도없어
Your mom doesn’t know
how to do anything.

그렇게하다
너희엄마처럼된다
If you keep that up,
you’ll become just like your mom.

자녀에게상대부모에대한
험담을하거나비난을하는건
안.돼.요(자막)
Speaking ill or criticizing the other parent
in front of your children is a no-no

우리그렇게하지말고
다시생각해보자
Let’s not do that
and think about it one more time.

니네아빠한테말해.
평생그런식으로살라고
Tell your dad.
Just live your life like that until you die.

자녀에게상대부모한테
모욕적인말을전달하게하는건
안.돼.요(자막)
Asking your children to deliver an
insulting message to the other parent is
a no-no

애한테아빠험담을하면안되겠지?
It’s not good to speak ill of him to his child.

아빠도와주러오는여자없었어?
Did any women come to help your dad?

자녀에게상대부모의행동을
염탐하도록하는건
안.돼.요
Asking your children to spy on
the other parent is a no-no.

아빠랑재미있게놀았어?
Did you have a good time with dad?

아빠는잘지내시고?
So is dad doing fine?

아빠랑살래? 엄마랑살래?
You want to live with daddy or mommy?

자녀에게
자신의편이되도록설득하는건
안.돼.요(자막)
Trying to persuade your children to side with
one parent over the other is a no-no

누구랑살아도엄마아빠는
네부모고
아빠는널사랑해
Regardless of who you live with,
mom and dad
are still your parents and I love you.

사랑해
I love you.

네아빠외국에돈벌러갔어
Your father went abroad to make money.

자녀와상대부모의
관계를단절시키는말을하는건
안.돼.요(자막)
Saying things that will cut the children’s
ties to a parent is a no-no

엄마랑아빠는
이제같이살지않기로했어
Mom and dad have decided
not to live together.

하지만여전히엄마랑아빠는널사랑해
But we still love you.

정말로사랑해
We really love you.

사랑해
We love you.
자, 이제우리아이의양육계획을
부모가함께세워볼까요?
양육협의를할때중요한점은
Now, let’s draft a child-rearing plan.
The important point to remember when discussing
child-rearing is that it should be based on the

부모의편의나욕심이아닌
자녀의행복과이익이우선되어야한다는점입니다.
best interest of the child rather than the parents’
convenience or wants.

그리고, 우리민법이
규정하고있는
세가지구체적사항은
자녀의동의에부합하는
양육자와친권자의결정,
접교섭방법의결정,
양육비지급에관한
사항입니다.
And the three specific factors
set forth in our Civil Code
are decision as to custodian
and parental right holder
with respect to the child,
decision as to the method of
visitation rights, and decision
as to providing childsupport.


39:29

면접교섭및양육시간분담(자막)
Sharing custodyand child-rearing times

엄마는외국에공부하러갔어
Your mom went abroad to study.

상대부모와자녀를
단절시켜서는안됩니다
You should not cut of the ties between
a parent and achild.

토요일2시에매주만나기로, 집에서.
We should meet every Saturday
at 2:00 p.m. at my house.

정기적으로만날수있는시간, 장소, 방법에대해구체적으로
논의하세요
You should discuss the time, place and
the method of a regular meeting in detail.

우리는이렇게정했어, 어때?
We have decided to do this. What do you think?

양육비지급
ChildSupport

양육비왜줘!
누구좋으라고
Why should I givechildsupport?
I know who’s going to spend it.

양육비는자녀를위한것입니다.
Childsupport is for the benefit of the children.

양육비안주는데
왜아빠를만나?
Why should you see you dad when
he doesn’t even providechildsupport?

슬퍼
Sad

양육비를지불하지않는다고해서
자녀와의접촉을
막지마세요
You should not keep your child from seeing
the other parent just because that other parent
is not givingchild support.

합의한양육비는정기적방식으로
지불하도록노력해야합니다.
The agreed childsupport
must be paid regularly.

매달 30일 50만원씩여기까지자막만있음
50 million won every 30th of the month

이혼하면더이상부부는아니지만
여전히우리는부모입니다.
Once you divorce, you may no longer be
husbands and wives, but you’re still parents.

이혼후가정이깨지는것이아니라,
자녀를중심으로협력적양육관계를맺는
새로운형태의가족이되는것입니다. 감사합니다.
Families are not broken with a divorce but rather
they become a new form of family centered around
the children. Thank you.

본영상은
부모와자녀들의상황에따라서
구체적내용이다를수있습니다.
This video may not be applicable depending on
the specific situations
between parents and their children.

‘부모’라는이름을지켜내시려는분들께응원을보내며
어려움에부딪힐땐
전문가의도움을받아보실것을권합니다.(자막)
We root for those who are striving to keep their
titles of “parents.” Please seek the help of professional
when you encounter a difficult situation.

주관
Sponsored by

대한민국법원대법원
Supreme Court of the Republic of Korea

기획법원
부모교육공동연구회
Executive Producer:
Joint Research Association, Court Parent Education

자문대한소아청소년정신의학회
Consulting: Korean Academy of Child and
Adolescent Psychiatry

도움주신분
성덕규상담위원(소아정신과의사)
이숙영상담위원(아동상담가)
강은숙상담위원(아동상담가)
Support provided by:
Dr. Sung Duk-Kyu, Counselor (M.D., Child Psychiatry)
Lee Sook-Young, Counselor (Child Counselor)
Kang Eun-Sook, Counselor (Child Counselor)

[용인시건강가정지원센터] 이미숙
서계원
[Yongin Health and Family Support Center] Lee Mi-suk
SeoKye-Won


캘리그래피미술가홍지윤
Calligraphy art: Hong Ji-Yun

제작박앤박미디어
Produced by: Park and Park media

법원부모교육
공동연구회
Joint Research Association,
Court Parent Education

대한소아청소년
정신의학회
Korean Academy
of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry

성덕규
Dr. Sung Duk-Kyu